Crazy Emails

These are all the love filled emails I have gotten from all the little Insta Punks out there! I FEEL the love!

Hey, i\’m from norway and i dig your site…..i know that punk is about anti-religion, anti-authority and almost about anti-everything, i\’m against all that but i won\’t be called a punk unless i wear punky clothes….

Before i discovered your site i wore normal clothes and had long hair….i kept telling everybody i was a punker but no one believed me! one day i had had enough! i went on the internet and searched for informasion on how you become a punk, then i found you site, it saved my life! after i had read everything on your site i went out to buy some stuff….
spiked bracelets and belt, converse hi tops, hair gel, bondage pants, shirts with punk logos on….everything you told me to and more(i added a couple of things that i thought looked punk….i have to find my own style you know.)

Then i came home, called my friend (he\’s a hairdresser)
and asked me why i suddenly called him (I hadn\’t talked to him in a while) then i said i wanted a mohawk! After he was done cutting my hair i put huge amounts of hair gel in my hair, stood upside-down and waited for my hair to dry….
after a while i stood up, and my hair fell down, the gel wasn\’t strong enough….then i got a idea! i remembered that you said: \”damage your hair,\” so i found a tube of glue and slapped a huge amount of glue on etc….
and it worked perfectly!

After putting on everything i had bought, and stitched on some \”punk logo\” patches i took a trip into town to see peoples reactions: they were speechless! they just stood there staring at me with their mouth open, i normally hate being stared at, but i loved it! i was a changed man! thank you for that!

An exciting new development for the Insta-Punk Kit! There is now a procedure by which you can insert spikes into your head. I’m not kidding; it combines the mohawk /and/ the spikes. Essentially, they make you shave your head (oi oi!) and then slice into your scalp and insert thin metal plates with sockets in them. After they heal, you can screw pretty much anything into them- spikes being the norm. Won’t /this/ make you a punk….
No, I’m not shitting you. You think I could make this up? But hell, it’s getting trendy ’round these parts, and if nothing else it’s good for a laugh.

heroinbob @ dontmesswithtexas. com

that here is a new thing in our skool and if it is
anywhere else… i live in shit ville nj aka. (brick)
and everyone in our ass skool is now prepy and preps
and there trying to be punks but they are little sufer
fags that are gay me im a sk8 boarder and sk8boarding
is dying it is all biking which i think is gay and
back to what i was talk abt preps trying 2 be punk
fuck preps punks are fucking better than them preps
think if u listen to old skool punk that they r punk!?
there not and they listen to pussy punk like blink 182
because there are pupular and on trl they are fucking
gay and everyone hates punks even my mom dosent want
me 2 be punk i say fuck them all they can all go to
hell but i wanted to know what would u do in the
fucking hell hole ass thing…? oh yea ur web site rox
dude keep up the good work

this is the most rediculous shit i have ever seen in my life. no offense, but the promotion to “jump” into a type of lifestyle by wearing the right clothes or “collecting as many punk CD’s as possible” is fucking retarded. these so called, “punkers”, they aren’t stupid. they don’t just grunt at questions asked. that’s rediculous. kinda funny that Brett Gurowitz…owner of epitaph records and founder of bad religion has his doctorate in science, and kinda funny that Dexter Holland, lead singer of the offspring was his class validictorian. the message sent by this page is not only rediculous with stereotypes, but also false in all of its accusations from punkers not being the most articulate, to the fact that blink 182 is the most punk band of all. its quite obvious that the maker of this website has no clue what the fuck they are talking about. anyone who actually likes punk, and maybe even likes blink, would still agree that blink 182 isn’t close to being considered the most punk band. goldfinger, offspring, blink, these bands aren’t fair representations of punk music. green day is even more punk than these bands. do some research and try making a different website in respect for the rest of the people that actually believed that they were a part of something a little bit different than the rest of the world. thank you

I take major offense to your webiste……

PThe following is what comes with the Insta Punk Kit:

Bondage Pants – Red Plaid
Black Sex Pistols T-shirt – sleeves torn off
Doc Martens – beat up, 10 hole.

Union Jack hankerchief – tie around leg.
Dirt – smear effectively for that “dirty” look.
Converse Hi-Tops – for the Old Skool look.

Thats not true…..
DIRT?>????excuse me… but i am NOT dirty…. and I do bathe… How dare you say that to me.

and another point…
‘t change your clothes, as you want to make it look like you have worn them forever.

Thats not true wither

PUNK is about being yourself… ITS NOT ABOUT THE CLOTHES or ANYTHING like that…..get a life and update your site…


-a true punker

you harry cock fuck! don’t you know you have to cut your bondage pants at
the knee to be considered punK rawk! And you’ve already forgotten the most
important rule to being truly punK; buying up all of the local band’s
t-shirts and demos, especially when the logo looks like a variation of
actual old-school punK bands. Crikey! Leave it up to a complete imbecile to
forget some of the most important aspects of punk-e-ness! More punK-a-fied

1. if for any reason some of your shirts have sleeves on them still, roll
them up, but in a very messy style

2. Any tattoo that says “punx”, “punky”, or is of/contains colored stars,
band logos etc… is guaranteed to rank you very high on the “true
punk-ometer” scale.

3. a screen name or 2 that is a title to a misfits or ramones song is a

4. When in doubt “I don’t give a fuck” is sure to convince anyone that’s
left, of your punK-ability

And how could you miss something as meaningful and convincing as the
bedroom, you bloody tit blister! The defining point of your punK-Status is
when people come over to see your room. if you have an actual bed frame,
hide it when company comes over, no one likes a punK Rawker with money.
Rememberm you are opressed! Society has dealt you unfair cards. If possible,
spray paint all over your walls, get at least on colored light (color it
yourself for the home-made, i’m poor look), and put up some album covers.

You’ll be accepted into PunK Culture in no time at all.

dear sir or madam,
i have stumbled across your website and was very confused as to if you
merly joking or actually being serious. just out of curiosity what bands
you in to? because you seem like the biggest fucking poser i’ve ever come
contact with. i mean some things were funny while others were very
offending, misleading, and ignorant. since you know so much about punk
and you are the super punk-‘rawk’-guru of the world i would love to be
enlightened by your endless knowledge so i can become one of your
this website really fucking pisses me off and punk rock didn’t start in
UK, by the way. looks like some one just skidded by on their punkrock
examination.” oi oi oi”(so hardcore). maybe someday you will find out what
punk is really about….i’m not going to waste my time trying to tell
someone who is just like every other fucking sheep in this country. your
just as bad as a fucking yuppie, you have the same beliefs as them just a
different exterior. or so it seems by the way you portray yourself on this
website. it’s people like you who fucking give punk rockers a bad name.(to
REAL punk rockers)


annika wisswaesser

you are getting hate mail from people pissed off about you taking the
yet you say its not taking the piss, then you say its a joke, then its
whats with you? fucking hell! I am glad to be a punk! that means I dont
into any catagory, unlike you, who fits into the catagory of the reason us
punks are here, if it wasn’t for filth like you taking the piss out of
people then we wouldn’t be here, tell ya what, the world is to samey, you
should be glad that these colourful, bright vibrant people are around to
spice up this world and add a little difference to the same old shit that
masturbates the ego of the crap society it fits into and the government
runs it! we are out here to push ourselfs away from you type, that go
wearing the same clothes as every such weirdo and sick anal fucker out
you never know, one day you might wear the same clothes as some guy that
decided that uniforms are a good idea for all schools! while we may be a
stereotype, at least we are not a stereotype that fits into the society
you stick up for, the very same one that you wake up to every day and
probably wish was different, you cant change it, but you can move away
it. And that is what the punks had the sense to do. THATS WHAT ITS ABOUT.
taking the piss out of us only shows the reason why your filthy society is
the reason punks moved away from it.
P.S., I hope you now appreciate why we don’t like to fit in, and that the
more you take the piss, the longer we will last, if society was to improve
from what bullshit it is now, then maybe we would come back to it. I
apolagise if I insulted you, it was merely to display how strong my
are in this matter.
once again, my regards. zizzy.

hey poser,
what the fuck is this bullshit your
putting on.”how to be a punk”,well you trendy
fuckhead,punk means not listening to dumbasses
like you,it means thinking for yourself.”your
only punk if u have a mohawk”, well i bet you
have the biggest fuckin mohawk this side of the
mississippi, actually i bet you have a goddam
bill gates haircut!and you saw blink 182 on
your bible of a channel mtv and said “hey i
remeber once on friends there was a dude with a
mohawk,why dont i go tell people how to be punk!
im sure a girl will finally talk to me now!”hmm
if your such a punk,name the 4 lead singers of
black flag!i can think of about 50 people that
dont have mohawks whose moms are more hardcore
than you!please email me back


p.s. how come your little doodle has a sxe shirt
yet you say to get drunk all the time?fuckhead

Another from the same person:
hey poser,
please do me a favor and email your
pic.i just want to see what you look like so if
ASS!!!! i dont care who you are,you do not
desocrate the misfits by putting their good name
on your site.!me and derek are serioulsy gonna
kick your ass.why the fuck is he wearing a
misfits shirt?because when you went o your
catholic church the preacher mentioned satanic
music and named them?and what you have done with
the dead kennedys.if jello biafra saw you,he
would kill you!o thats right you dont know who
he is , well i wont contribute anymore to your and derek are serioulsy gonna slit your
thraot and piss on your grave!!!!NOW YOU HAVE US


are you serious…an insta punk kit…who are you trying to kid everything
that gross site isnt punk at all…you cant teach sone loser to be punk
trendy and being trendy is not punk…its about following your own trends
moron you cant go around and sneer and say oioi and rub dirt on yourself
say your punk because thats not punk thats trendy..and also disgusting ok
know many punks who are clean also you have to be the biggest poser of all
becaus not only do you not know what punk is but your misinterpreting
everything about it….i hope you dont write sXe all over yourself and
drink vodka and puke allover yourself cuz thats just an oxymoron..straight
edge is when you DONT drink you fucking idiot. you make me sick what are
trying to do market the image that punk is all about safety pins and
mohawks…you dont need a mohawk to be punk you fucking loser and were not
all mean and we dont growl…but obviously your some dumb 5th grader whos
teacher just taught them html so they made a site about something that
know NOTHING about…stop calling yourself punk you TRENDY fucking faggot
dont embarrass yourself by showing the world how much of a loser you are
oh and PS blink182 the offspring and greenday arent punk and they both
fucking admit it their pop punk trendy shit for a loser like you and
is regae and save ferris is not punk in the slightest


you are the biggest poseur. you think yer so punk? telling people how to
punk is against punk. most of the bands you listed arnt even punk. and
listening to punk doesnt make you punk. punk is about being free, being
yerself. haha, do you even know what straight edge is? drawing x’s on yer
hands doesnt make you punk. punk has nothing to do with fasion. i mean
punks may dress like that, but they definatley dont have to because its
being free. you are telling people how to walk how to talk how to listen
music, thats not punk, thats AGAINST punk.
oh and having names of bands dont make you punk. just because you have
rock cds (blink 182, goldfinger, offspring, sum 41, sublime,and most of
bands you named ARE NOT PUNK, they arnt rebllious at all, all they sing
is girls and love and growing up shit), dressing punk, and cussing does
make you punk. its in you. its being free. i have seen more punk people
wear glasses, dress geeky, and get straight A’s in school than people who
have spiked hair plaids mowhawks and dead kennedys cds. do you even know
real old school punk is? its shit like the stooges, velvet underground,
york dolls, ramones, billy bragg, dead boys. shit like that is some good
punk. and do you even know what oi means? it means peace and unity. it
mean punk. oh and do you even know what stright edge is? wand whats the
brittish flag. are you a patriotic fuck? are you a nationalist? this is
america, burn some american flags buddy.
do you have any idea what REAL anarchy is? its not about chaos at all. its
about order and civilizationwithout laws or government. its hwere people
together in groups of people who know and trust eachother and would have
reason to hurt one another or their property. and also in that comunity or
group their are no rules, but since these people think alike they wouldnt
wanna go out of controll. the idea of anarchy is originally about peace.
whats wrong with peace signs? havnt you ever seen anti-flag? have you ever
heard of crass? they are punk and have peace. there is nothing wrong with
peace. punk isnt about war. punk evolved form the hippie scene belive it
not. or at least part of it did. stop telling people how to be punk,
what you are telling them inst really punk. you are misleading kids and
turning them into poseurs. you are killing punk, just like all these
bands on mtv such as blink 182. get your facts straight and stop telling
people how to be punk….poseur

You have a very nice site, fucker.
I must admit, I didn’t think there was anyone else out there like me. As cynical as me. Wow, you’ve got that pure hatred and witty remark thing going on there, I really admire it.

One thing though. I don’t look punk. I don’t look goth. I don’t look like a raver kiddy, the preppy or the hippy.

So what am I? I just wear what looks OK, and I try and not look like a moron when it comes to hair cuts, but man is it hard. Especially when you ARE a moron. I listen to lots of punk, does that make me an apathetic borderline punk bastard?

And exactly what do YOU look like, may I ask?

My guess is the “messy” hair look with the beat up brown cord pants and a t-shirt.

Or perhaps you’re even a clean cut fellow with a part and some khakis, hell if I know.

It would be interesting to see, though.

It’s so hard to make friends when you despise everyone else for trying so hard, isn’t it?. Being one mean son of a bitch DOES have it’s benefits, and I suppose that’s one of them.

Anything that isn’t “I bought this shirt cause it looked ok” and “What’s a comb?” seems kind of fake, in my opinion. You try so hard to look like you don’t care at all, yet you spend so much time CARING about how you look.

Funny stuff. I should also add I don’t always seem right in the head, so I suppose it really isn’t a compliment that I’m anything like you.

In fact, you should probably kill yourself.

Lovingly (perhaps with even a bit of tongue),

That was a fun email. Here is his email address. You guys should email him and tell him that being a mean son of a bitch DOES have it’s benefits. I can guarantee I get more pussy than this guy any day. HAHAHAH

Hey hey-

Just wanted to write you about your site. I think it’s fuckin hilarious.
When I got into the punk scene I never really thought about what people were
going to think, or what. It started when I realized how much I loved the
music. I started going to local punk shows so I could hear more of it, and
my family doesn’t have much money so i just sort of used what I had, and
stole from Salvo. I guess I dress sort of old school punk, I don’t just hang
out with punks, that’s fuckin bullshit. Anyway..I really don’t like these
new punks ’round my town, in freshly pressed sex pistols shirts, with their
clean little mohawks and a studded bracelet. They don’t know what it’s
fuckin’ all about. They can dress like that, and scream oi! and anarchy! all
they want, but they’ll never figure it out. Well I just wanted to say
thanks, i’m sick of all the rich little posers too. But oh well…not much
we can do, they decide being a raver or goth is cooler and cling to that
sooner or later. Write back if you get a chance.

I was reading the Insta Punk Kit and I came across the safety pin resisting
the dominant idealogy thing… I just thought I’d mention that it also
started with the concentration camps in Nazi Germany. I mean, we all know
how many punks adore skinhead neo-nazis, right? Well, during WWII people who
were helping the Jews escape would wear safety pins on their clothes to
signify their secret protest of the war and to let all Jews know that bearer
could be trusted. My local old skool mentor once told me that the safety pin
thing was an extension of that. Just so ya know.

Jesus fuck, where do you people get this stuff? I don’t know if this is true or not, I will look
into it, one day when I am excrutiatingly bored, which will be like, five years from now. Can anyone confirm
or deny this slop? And PROVE it, not just your dumb ass opinion because that means shit to me.

fag what the hell? anyone who becomes insta punk is a fucking poseur. oh
hell yes im bitching and oh hell yea i know everything about the scene, and
oh hell yes thats how poseur is spelled. have fun making potentialy punk rock
kids into faggots.

Bye, Jeff(the punkest punk in the punk world)

Hey i think those guys look punk and everything, but ar they? anyone can
look punk and you make it sound like that if you look it, then you are punk,
punk was a cause started when we all felt lost. good job with the look part,
but i think you should work on what punk really is. but i still love your
site, just constructive critisism is what this is hehe. bye.

Hi, I was at your site the other day; I liked all the pics and junk you had
put up. Anyways, I put together a punk outfit, and I wanted you to see if
it was punk enough (I’m more of a raver than a punk, so I’m just piecing
things together.)
*orange fishnet stockings
*black converse (falling apart and scuffed to death, they have dirty red
*black leather jacket
*chain bracelets and necklaces
*studed collar
*black shirt held together with safety pins
*safety pin earings
and I already have purple/red and orange hair

i was just wonderin how you manage to think all punks have to be like that. cause im a punk
and me and my friends have never said oi oi in our lives. you know how you said blink 182 is
the best punk band ever well their not cause the sold out. the best punk rock band should be
the ramones or rancid but not blink 182.
i was also wonderin if you know where i could by cheep bondage pants onl line.

trista aka spikey

Hay man, that insta punk site is funny. you are such a genius. it is all the guestbook shit that makes it funny. has anyone e-maled you to see how much the insta punk kit costs? hah. anyways, does that james guy with the ouch stick live in southern california? if he does, tell me cause he is hot.

hey-oki just checked out ur site and i think itz really cool..
if u wanna be a poser. i still kinda preppy cuz im still transitioning..
i love punk and ska music…but isnt’ the whole attitude about being an individual and
being yourself? not following the stereotype?
i dunno..i just think u should change the site a little….

You don’t have to wear chains and spiked belts to be punk…thats not the
definition of punk…punk isn’t about trying to make people scared of you.
its the opposite of all that. its to make a statement about who you are and
what you believe in. so wearing a couple chans and spiking ur hair doesn’t
make you punk.

I need to come up with a basic response to the hundreds of emails that don’t understand
that this site is a joke. You would think I would have done that by now, don’t you? Someone want to
write me a basic summarization of how this site is a joke, and what it is making fun of? Then I will just
copy and paste that to every fucknut that flames me. 😛

just to let you know, punk is an attitude, not an appearnace and punk did
not originate in the UK. it started in new york with the ramones. UK punk
started becasue of the ramones and the sex pistols suck and people who wear
the british flag are fucking stupid becasue you’re american not english. im
sure that crap i babbled is of no importance to you or site, but oh well.

haha. your website amuses me. the one about how to be a punk. first of all,
blink 182 isnt punk anymore. they’re sell outs. the most punk of all bands is
not blink. i think that the most punk of all bands is rancid. they’re TRUE
punks, unlike blink. they have gone through a lot of shit to get to where
they are right now, unlike blink. maybe blink has gone through some stuff,
but not like rancid. and you say that a true punk has a mohawk, huh? i dont
see any of the dudes from blink with a mohawk. all TRUE punks hate blink now.
oh, and you cant teach someone how to be a punk. you’re either born a punk or
just become one. every punk is different from one another. you’re telling
people to draw attention to themselves and show off that they’re punks, but
TRUE punks dont do that. they dont walk around in their bondage pants showing
off and shit, they dont care. they dont care what people think about them.
they do whatever the fuck they want. your site really pisses me (and other
TRUE punks) off, but it amuses me also. i feel sorry for you. you’re pityful.
you want people to think that punks are like the bestest kind of people out
there. you want people to be overly proud of themselves for being punks. if
you were a TRUE punk, you wouldnt care about shit like that. you’re probably
not even a punk. but i dont care. that’s all i have to say about your dumbass
website. oh, one more thing, if anyone ever tells me how to be a punk or how
to act like one instead of acting like myself, i’d say FUCK YOU! and that’s
probably what all TRUE punks that have seen your website say. there’s no
actual PERFECT TRUE PUNK out there cuz all punks are different, so its stupid
of you for trying to tell people how to be a TRUE punk. but you’re actually
telling them how to be YOUR perfect image of a punk. you cannot make punks,
remember that.

hey umm im onely 12 and all the real punks in my town think im a poser
because the other day i was talkin to this kid and i blsnked out and he asked
me some songs from black flag and i was like ohh shit

hey man ive been looking through your page and you failed to see that us
“punks” arent too smart…i came across a lot of words i dont understand
like “defiant” and “bondage” and im too lazy to list the rest…

and what does “passersby” mean?

Good lord. Does the amusement with these emails ever end? Ever hear of a dictionary???

god ur site is the fuckin hilarious thing ive ever seen all those gay wanks
taking it seriously lol fuckin cunts keep up the good work!!!!

what the point of insta punk kit? u cant make ppl punks

These aim people are retards. Here is another aim conversation with some retard 15 year old. The first part got lost
because I closed the window. Please understand, I am not here to tell you how to look punk/goth/etc, I have a day job
in which I am very busy, and my music is better than yours, regardless of what you think. Especially if you are trying
to debate with me that Korn is better. *snickers* (ps feel free to flame this loser. He annoys me)

NutFuzzLeS89: u dress like one
sykospark: is that a question or a statement.
NutFuzzLeS89: do u dress like a rivethead?
sykospark: hehhee
sykospark: yah sure
NutFuzzLeS89: y did u make the site?
NutFuzzLeS89: ur finishing ur prep?
sykospark: alas, no. 🙁
sykospark: punk must be redesigned first.
sykospark: /then/ prep.
NutFuzzLeS89: redesighned?
NutFuzzLeS89: ur gettin rid of it
sykospark: no. redesigned. it looks horrible the way it is.
sykospark: a new /look/
sykospark: content stays same
NutFuzzLeS89: wut the punk one?
sykospark: but it will have some nifty new features
sykospark: yes. the punk one.
NutFuzzLeS89: cool the punk one is my fav
sykospark: well, it looks the worst right now, but if i ever get it done, it will b ereally cool
sykospark: there will be a big fat message board
sykospark: and everything will look better
NutFuzzLeS89: cool
NutFuzzLeS89: i dont goths that much
NutFuzzLeS89: how didi u htink of this site?
NutFuzzLeS89: think*
sykospark: did you go to that link i sent you?
sykospark: that explains it.
NutFuzzLeS89: yea iam on it right now
NutFuzzLeS89: can i ask u a question
NutFuzzLeS89: u kno a lot of how punks dress right?
sykospark: yes.
NutFuzzLeS89: can punks were long shorts with long colored socks? like blink182 does?
sykospark: punks can wear whatever the fuck they want.
NutFuzzLeS89: well in ur site it aays ur not a punk if u dont gotta moehawk
sykospark: that’s right.
sykospark: you’re not a real punk unless you shave half your head and spike the rest.
sykospark: 😛
NutFuzzLeS89: so iam sayin i could were long socks wit shorts ? right
sykospark: are you asking for advice on how to dress punk?
NutFuzzLeS89: if i said yes woold u kill me?
sykospark: no.
sykospark: but so many people ask me for advice on how to look
sykospark: i think i shoudl start charging you people
NutFuzzLeS89: yea is that bad?
sykospark: considering i do al that work for free
sykospark: and my job is putting a hole in my stomach
sykospark: i could use the extra $$

NutFuzzLeS89: so im alud to ask u right?
sykospark: for five bux you can ask me anything.
sykospark: go get your mom’s credit card
NutFuzzLeS89: whats ur problem
sykospark: i work my ass off, i am stressed out, and i have a 14 year old asking me how to dress punk.
sykospark: and you ask me what my problem is?
NutFuzzLeS89: ?
NutFuzzLeS89: what bands do you like?
NutFuzzLeS89: ?
sykospark: Is your name tim?
NutFuzzLeS89: yea
sykospark: What do you mean ‘?’?
NutFuzzLeS89: y?
NutFuzzLeS89: what>?
sykospark: because you signed my guestbook. 😛
sykospark: what are you questioning? my bands?
NutFuzzLeS89: no no nothing from ur site just what kinda music do u listen to
NutFuzzLeS89: ?
NutFuzzLeS89: punk gothic ?
sykospark: industrial / power noise
sykospark: did you not go to ?
NutFuzzLeS89: thats cool
sykospark: That describes my musical preferences.
NutFuzzLeS89: o yea forget sorry
NutFuzzLeS89: a/s/l?
sykospark: I hate that question. Why don’t you answer that one first?
sykospark: I say where I live on my personal site.
NutFuzzLeS89: 15/m/pz
NutFuzzLeS89: pa**
sykospark: There is a drawing of me so it is obvious what my gender is.
sykospark: and I am obviously old enough to have graduated from college.
NutFuzzLeS89: i didnt ssee it
sykospark: because it wasn’t one of the pages I sent to you directly 😛
NutFuzzLeS89: if i saw it mayb
NutFuzzLeS89: u wokin on ur sit right no
NutFuzzLeS89: now**
NutFuzzLeS89: site**
sykospark: no. I am working at my job.
NutFuzzLeS89: o i c
NutFuzzLeS89: u hink limp bizkit r sell outs
sykospark: Sure.
sykospark: I wouldn’t know. I dont’ listen to their music.
NutFuzzLeS89: ok
sykospark: Shitty ass radio rock bands do not interest me.
sykospark: My music is by far superior than the drabble on the airwaves.
NutFuzzLeS89: korns good
sykospark: no, korn is not good.
sykospark: korn is the same thing as limp bizkit.
NutFuzzLeS89: yea they r
NutFuzzLeS89: nope
sykospark: go ahead and think that.
NutFuzzLeS89: how/
NutFuzzLeS89: ]?
sykospark: my music could kick korn’s ass.
NutFuzzLeS89: y do u think
sykospark: up and down the street.
NutFuzzLeS89: nah
sykospark: mainstream radio rock.
sykospark: tis all.
NutFuzzLeS89: korn arent sell oust
sykospark: *sighs*
sykospark: but their music is so .. drab.
NutFuzzLeS89: they didint turn rap like limp did
sykospark: no offense, but I am very busy, so if you want to talk about how good korn is, I am the wrong person to discuss that with. because..well.KORN SUCkS ASS
sykospark: as does limp bizkit, powerman 5000, linkin park and marilyn manson
NutFuzzLeS89: nah
sykospark: and coal chamber
NutFuzzLeS89: nah
sykospark: and whatever else is on the airwaves
sykospark: *sighS* go buy some wumpscut
sykospark: if you like heavy hardcore
NutFuzzLeS89: ur music sux
sykospark: you have never even heard of my music
NutFuzzLeS89: hardcroe is korn
sykospark: i can bet you 100 dollars that you haven’t heard of a single band on my music page.
NutFuzzLeS89: i didnt look at ur pointless music sorry
NutFuzzLeS89: i hate hardcore
NutFuzzLeS89: o yea what do they say again
NutFuzzLeS89: ?
sykospark: I don’t listen to hardcore.

anyways, the retard goes on to try to engage me in conversation, denies warning me on aim (it TELLS me who warned me, retard)
and it is 5:35 pm and I am still at work. *sigh* I can either stay here, or commute home in traffic. Bleh.

Ok, I’m not a punk. The guy I’m seeing is. He is nothing u say of this and doesnt act like that. I don’t even see where u are getting this from. I mean I’m naive of the whole thing, but this is ridiculous. He is a clean cut, very attractive, and smart young man. My email is if you have anything to say. I think this is just flat out retarded get a life.

you forgot how punks arent allowed to tell racial jokes……..and how they
are supposed to Free Abu Jamal!!

blink 182 is not punk its pop gwt youre facts straight
and if someone has a sex pistols cd and dont even like it or know who they are….they are not a punk they are serious try hards….just becuase you dress like or mabee even look like a punk doesnt mean you are anyway near a real punk so dude…..this is pretty said ay….but it is a great laugh….punk on

he is obvioisly a poseur, how could a REAL punk make
both goth and punk poster child? also whats this about expinsive punk gear?? I buy my crap at thrift stores, or dig
it out of peoples garbage(like the jacket i’m wearing now)

Email One:your “inst punk kit” is the most sterotypical thing i have ever read about
punks. ever. i find myself wondering if this is sarcasm, you are making fun
of posers, or you just have no idea what punk is about and are exploiting it.
can you clarify?

Email Two:i see.. it took me a while to figure that out. it is an intersting collection
of steryotypes . i’m sure i’ll have fun directing some of the “punks” at my
school there, to it, to see if they take it seriously. can i link it from my

maybe chauncey looks like a punk but the other fags look like their just
gothic!! You shit heads need to learn!! Not this fucking gothic shit!! It
ain’t punk!!

Just wanted to say nice page. Sweet Jesus, I couldn’t believe the number of
psychos and “true punkers” that wrote to you. Damn. Someone should throw a
dictionary at that thirteen year old retarded boy. Mabey he’d learn to
spell. Oh, I’m sorry did I offend any of you? Does that make me a “poser”?
A I a “fag” now? Are you gonna kick my ass with your expensive Doc Martins
to show everyone what a hardcore punk you are? Calm down, you little nazis.
Smoke some weed or get drunk or something. Just pull that spiked pole out
of your ass and you’ll be fine. Anyway, I may be sending a pic of one of my
friends who could qualify to be one of your poster boys.

(3 from the same person)
OOOk, first of all…i may be 14 but im sure as hell not too young. but
that’s ok. it doesn’t bother me. But what does bother me is that all the
punks that send you that hate mail and are really pissed at you cuz they
think that your a poser. but they don’t get the joke. the site is just for
fun and i makes fun of posers. im not gunna tell them to take a joke or
lighten up because its kinda funny reading all this mail from people who hate
you. but im on your side. love ya

you need to make a girl section on the insta punk kit

ok i think i have some aditions for the female section that we talked about
(although you may not remember me or the emails we exchanged) for the chick
section you should basically have the same idea but just a few differences.
like for clothes…girls can really go around with ripped t shirts without
the unfortune of exposing their bras so you should say which shirts and crap
like that. the boots and pants are basically the same so….you should say
what kind of jackets like if it would be rad for chicks to wear leather
jackets or not. and hair like how girls should dye their hair and what colors
and basically anything else you can think of…..keep up the humor and
continue to make fun of the posers who actually believe your serious oi

hey this is sid i was just wondering if i should lose my beer gut i really
dont give a fuck , but i was wondering if i should lose some weightj, and
while i have this beer gut i still tend to wear tight shirts but i still have
muscles tell me what i should do

who the hell cares? funny site… i found the comedy in it.. it’s kinda sad (*sigh*) that people are arguing over how “damn punky” they are when i thought the whole point of being “damn punky” was to non-conform.. those damn conformists… funny stuff.. keep up the good work (what the hell does Oi? mean)

your really should have a list of people who can’t figure out this site is
ment to be joke.
I mean honestly, its called Sarcasm.

I just got done viewing you’re fucking site. You must have absolutely no life
to think about all the shit you THINK punk rock it. You’ve obviously been
observing poseurs you’re whole life because you have not one clue of what the
essence of punk rock is. You’re hatefully sarcastic bullshit site does bring
up one point. The only reason you are so fucking pissed off and want to take
all the time it must have taken you to come up with that shit is because you
tried to be punk once in your life and you got your poseur ass kicked many
times. That really is the only explanation for you to be so committed to a
site that knocks a whole culture of people…. Get a fucking life, stop
worrying about people who hate you, or kill yourself. These are your only
two options for bettering yourself.

At least they spelled “poseur” right.

dude whats your problem….if you made this website your a totla loser. you
can define punk. in this web site your trying to teach people how to be punk
and you cant. punk isnt the way you walk, what color your hair is, how you
dress, how many times you can say oi, what kind of accesories you wear or
what music you listen to… punk is a way of life. you cant teach it you just
are it. and anyone who folled you gay proceedures is a loser to for being a
poseing wanna be.
you suck.

This retard left their aol address. Let me show you what happens when you go to flame me over email
with your retarded aol account:

sykospark: How can you say I suck when you can’t even spell correctly?
CoLeYx182: b/c your trying to drfing punk when you cant
sykospark: The site is a joke.
sykospark: It is making fun of poseurs. (Please take note on the spelling of that last word)
CoLeYx182: oh well its gay
CoLeYx182: fich dich
sykospark: Not as gay as a person who’s handle has alternating caps and ends in ‘182’, which I will take to reflect Blink 182
sykospark: lmao.
sykospark: German isn’t very punk.
CoLeYx182: umm like i havent listened to blink in years
CoLeYx182: i dont care
sykospark: ummm like your handle is still gay.
CoLeYx182: go away
sykospark: Sorry you are too retarded to understand a higher level of humor.

OK. So I have had much better flame wars over aim, but I haven’t catalogued them until now. But starting now,
I will show you all the retardwars my bored ass will ensue if you flame me, and misspell every other word, but call ME stupid.

my mom wont let me get a mohawk how can i talk her into it and by the way im
only 14 but am punk as hell

If you are so punk, then why don’t you just go ahead and give YOURSELF a mohawk? REAL punks
don’t pussy out and listen to their mamas. 😛

hey babe, love yer fucking site, very hard-core but you need more punk pics.
they can usually be spotted outside yer local mall, the nearest Starbucks or
any trendy little record store. make sure you throw some of those super Grrr
chicks in with the bitch handles and tank girl threads. don’t forget our
little motto ether: drink, fuck, fight! and make sure to stand up for unity,
human rights, freedom, and individuality … as you thrash another poser, for
not being “OI” enough…now that’s punk rock. love yer stereo typical gutter
punk, femmi…Zoey…

Feel free to submit any fotos of your punk asses to me.

If I did classify myself though I would say Iam a Punk
.Your site rocks .My favorites are the Raver ,Goth
,Punk , and Ho’ .I laughed so much I puke(I really
did) .Can you do one on Racist Police Officers ,Dumb
Jocks(Smart Jocks like me are generally
not assholes)Baby Mama’s ,Pimps ,Skaters(boarders) ,
and Ghetto White Girl Drama Mama’s .Wait a minute how
about Great White Hip Hoppers .I’ll help you on
everyone .

Thought you’d think this is interesting: The actual definition of a punk,
according to the dictionary, is a person in prison who enjoys homosexual
acts. HAHAHAHA, looking at those faggots you’d think it is true

OI! SkinHeads!

so you are a genious. i love you long time. no seriously, that was quite
entertaining. i listen to punk music and have purple streaks in my hair,
i know now that we must fight to the death. i just wanted to personally
thank you for setting up your website. if i hadn’t of read it, i might of
still been walking around without any piercings or dirt on my face. – you
should have done a page on hygiene- us punks, we don’t like the high tech
tools that are toothpaste and toothbrush- rubbing a napkin you found in
dumpster across your teeth works alot better. and you should never wash
the gell from your hair. so that next time you don’t really have to use so
much and just hold it up with the residue and dirt. so what im trying to
is that tuna is good with mayo, olives, onions, paprika, and cream cheese.
(seriously) well im off to go fuck the government. have a punk rock


Message: The ENTIRE instapunk kit is demeaning to the punk subculture!! Punk is not an insta kit! It is a state of mind that is cheap to certain incites on reality. To jack up the entire “punk” mentality is ludicrous and absurd. SO SHUT THE HELL UP YOU GOD DAMN TRENDY ASS POSER!

In case you are asking how we came to such a conclusion, check your music page! YOU ARE A BILLBOARD FOR BLINK 182!!!! the biggest poser, sell out band, in the history of PUNK Rock music!

By the way I hope your midlife crisis comes to an end soon, either that or you kill yourself! The entire punk community would be better off if you were dead!

you need to make a girl section on the insta punk kit

OOOk, first of all…i may be 14 but im sure as hell not too young. but
that’s ok. it doesn’t bother me. But what does bother me is that all the
punks that send you that hate mail and are really pissed at you cuz they
think that your a poser. but they don’t get the joke. the site is just for
fun and i makes fun of posers. im not gunna tell them to take a joke or
lighten up because its kinda funny reading all this mail from people who hate
you. but im on your side. love ya

Hey, your page is hilarious! All these people who are so obsessed with
what punk is should just chill and be themselves. who really cares if
its punk or prep or goth. they just need to calm down and stop being so
mean. really now, is it all necessary? Riiiight…

haha your an idiot… you cant even make FUN of punk rock right!

hI, just emailing to tell you your page is great.
I can now honestly say i am a PUNK. just kidding! i love what your doing. I read the email page and saw that you’ve accomplished just what you wanted. Your page stands as a consant reminder of just how stupid people really are! they all seem to take you seriously.
You did exactly the right things to piss them off. You are quite the admirable person and i respect your genius ideas. I myself do listen to punk, but i dont associate with most of the idiots. There are a few smart punks out there. Well, i must go, i’ll leave you with a quote. oh how PUNK ROCK of me!
“Half the world is composed of idiots, the other half of people clever enough to take indecent advantage of them.”
-Walter Kerr
IM me sometime if you want, you sound like a fun kid to talk to.

I’ll send you some punk pics when I get some! I just got a mowhawk (cough) yes i was drunk…. (shhhhhh dont tell!) And when I get some army pants Ill get you some picsssss…… and ect. yes yes yes you should owe me (jk) My friend is getting me a semi early X-mas christmas of a web cam so when i get it youll getchur pic… I could also give you some goth….hmm….. Oi Oi Oi! What does that mean anyways? evvvvvery one says it but no one knows! GEEZ! hmm what are you? im mean sub culture wise? People call me confused! 0.o! thats cuz im random! and im punk and im prep and im goth ..,.. prep ity raver ….. BUA HAH HAH crazy I say…. hmm no i dont do drugs! if i did i’d be normal! Sorry for the long email mail me back! I LOVE YOU SITE!
remember OI !

honstly,I am afraid to click on any of your links.I feel like you site is teaching people to be punk and uhh i think that is something that should come natural

i am e-mailing you on your punk genius. although i won’t get a mohawk, for
it looks kinda weird on girls, the whole sight was totally interesting

Punk genius…heheheh

that is the funniest shit i have ever seen.i bet you get alot of hate mail
for it.. oh, but you can wear bondage pants if you’re a punk, as long as you
have 2 other belts hanging off your ass, one with spikes, and one with studs
for the full poser look.. you need to correct that 🙂
that was a good idea to do a page like that, made me feel so much better
about my “punk rock”


du u really sell those kits cause i need sum of that strong spary in the punk
section and i gt the joke im not a posuer

Does this person not live near a drug store? Don’t you people know where the hell to buy hairspray? Haha!

I know your page is meant for humor, however I am really into punk rock
and I just wanted to ask you if you knew any good methods on mohawking
my hair as in gel preference or whatever. I have thick hair and has a
sort of unwanted curl to it so if you know of a good hair straightener
or relaxer I’d appreciate that information too. As for the actual
spiking the mohawk, I heard you could use egg whites or even glue/rubber
cement (for the extremely high hawks).

Thanks a lot,


Ugh, egg whites!?

your pages was funny, but im not sure if you were serious,

its not a good idea to were the union jack, the whole english punk thing is
cool,but only if your english. dont get me wrong i love britpunk and shit
like that but if its one thing i hate worse the america its england remember
back in the 1700’s we were fighting for our indepedence, to escape the
oppression of the british gov’t
(sorry i dont mean this to be a history lesson) i just dont want you to
confuse some little new comer, but if its a joke thats cool, its cool either
way i just dont agree on your views on the whole union jack and goldfinger
thing but your panges is cool so please excuse me for being rude about it

thanx viciousnrotten

You dont what the fuck yer talking about. Yer “how to be a punk page” is a
fucking embarrasment. Do everyone a favor and shut it down.

dear oposer

This websites is a peace of crap. U suck and so does ur website. Ur
website is like shity card board toilet paper. “PUNK KIT” what the f*ck is
that. U shame the name PUNK U computer nerd

I have one thing to say- YOU’RE NOT PUNK, YOU’RE A POSER! SINCE WHEN IS A

Hey… I’m not writing to complain about your site, or to bitch at you for
saying how much you suck… if people are e-mailing you and saying that shit
to you then you know what? They wrote to you because they felt your page was
a direct attack on them which means they are the posers. Any fool would know
you’re joking about this. ANYONE, punk, goth, raver, would know this is a
joke. It’s just our population is full of retards who don’t understand the
concept of humor. Keep up the site because I for one enjoyed it, because I’m
luckily not a poser nor a retard. 🙂 What is the next insta kit, I’m
wondering? It’s really funny to see peoples reactions to your page – think of
all the power you have, to get all these dorks across the nation riled up
from something they see on the screen. Good luck on getting more people
angry. Kudos!


Next kit on the line, after I put finishing touches on the Raver and Rivethead kits, is an Insta Hippie Kits. I hate those
bellbottom wearing, pot smoking, grateful dead listening weirdos!

I am interested in purchasing one of your kits, however, rumor has it
that you are in the middle of developing the “Punk As Fuck- Deluxe Kit! Now
with 25% more Punk Rock”. Is this true? You should, because I hear the
Japanese are developing something called “High Resolution Super-American
Punko-rocko-mon” kit…don’t let what happened to the American automotive
industry happen to the punk scene.
Anyway, great site! I totally empathize. I’ve always heard people
complain about havng their cultures ‘raped’, ‘robbed’, or ‘stolen’ from them
and have always considered such statements as whining… that is until about
10 years ago, when I began to notice that corporations were beginning to see
the potential for a new market and exploited it by taking punk, packaging it,
slapping labels on it and selling it off to bored suburban youth as
‘rebellion’. What these kids didn’t (and don’t) realize is that they’re not
rebels…they’re consumers.
This never bothered me that much. I just laughed it off and considered
the kids to be posers (which they are) and made it clear to them that they
were. I also found it humorous and satisfying that corporations, after
spending millions in marketing research, still couldn’t get it right as all
they produced was watered-down, bubble- gum punk rock…boy did they miss the
point! ‘Rebellion’ mass produced and mass marketed… by corporations! Thus
negating the entire point. Fools, all of them! What a phenomenal waste of
money! The straw that really broke the camel’s back for me (and really got me
steamed) was when corporations began putting punk music in their commercials
(i.e. Sex Pistols, Buzzcocks, Black Flag, etc.)… this is when I felt what
Blacks and Native Americans have felt for years; my culture had been raped,
robbed, and exploited.
Anyway, just wanted to say once again that ou have a great site here. I
was also wondering if I could get your permission to copy one of your
I was wondering if I could copy one of your banners and turn them into
stickers so I can put them on any car with a No Doubt, NO FX, Rancid, or
Blink 182 sticker on it.


I think that sticker thing is a great idea. I have images ready to be made into stickers if anyone is interested. Spread the word!

dude i was going to mail you fuckin hate mail for trying to make a punk kit
but i totaly agree with you im fed up with all that garbage to so right on

haha oh my god!!!
this is absolute rubbish and totally goes against what “goths”, “punks” or
whoever stand up for. i seriously hope this is a joke.

…there are no words…..

hahaha…ok well whatever.

but you realize youre going to hell now…

sleep well


Reading all the hate mail makes me realize how shallow minded people are in
America. Although, i have to admit, it’s kind of entertaining the way these
people feel so “victimized.” Funny sight….

I think it is fucking ricdiculous people take your site so seriously. Right
when I came to this page I was thinking “I bet a bunch of assholes emailed
this person harassing shit about being a poser” and my was I right. Anybody
knows that being a punk isn’t just about hair and fashion. I like your site.
I found it amusing

“Insta-punk” is great! Insta-punk for insta-poseurs, eh? I particularly
liked the bit about Blink 182 being the essence of all punk. Everybody
knows nudity is essential for REAL punkers.

hey i hate u i know who u are u will get bnombed unless the site is down in
24 hours when it happens u will know my name is the lord of punk i hate
goths so dont think im that fuck u and good bye

Right the fuck on! You don’t know how ecstatic I was to see this site that expressed exactly how i feel about all that shit. it was like reading my own mind. The little stupid preppie/wanna be punk, “mommy, will you buy me that belt and those spikes and this t-shirt” kids, the ones who think you are “insulting” punks and goths, when its the posers like them who you’re ripping on! my most favorite thing to do is get drunk, go to a show, and stomp them into the ground! I found all those comments that say your site “is a piece of shit!” extremely funny. Its pretty lame that so many people are too stupid to recognize a joke when they see one. I have to compliment you on your genius, finally a respectable non-poserish website. nobody in this hellhole called earth can buy punk rock (unless a poser asks his mom to buy him a cd. heh,heh). i’ve never spent a cent on my accessories. i either made, stole, or inherited, my leather, spikes, chains, etc. you are born w/punk inside you.
i have a need to brag about my eleven inch high red bi-hawk i’ve had for two years. I dig the punk boy doddles and the rat impaled on a spike.

-KC Mauk

I just want to say that I think the whole insta-poser-fad concept is pretty cool.when I was 19 I had hair to (and probably on) my ass. When I got the ‘hawk’ it was over 2 feet tall. (although I hardly ever spiked it, it was just to much trouble to walk a straight line in the wind)
since then I’ve been through to many hairstyles and peircings to talk about, let alone the music I crave. Anyway, I think my point may have been that I didn’t do it because I was a punk, or a goth, or a metal head, or any other lame ass reason. I did it because I wanted to, and that’s the only part that really matters. If these fools can’t relize that all sub-cultures come from the same place then they will never get your jokes, or an inkling of a real life for that matter…
I must say “BRAVO, or whatever Kudos type word is in fashion now.
By the way, I’m 31 years old now, I am old enough to know what punk USED to be about, and I only hope that all 6 of my children grow up with enough sence to be themselves and let everyone else do the same…

Keep up the ridicule, maybe someone will get it and grow up.–Krusty Ruffle a.k.a. The cockroach king!

What in the hell are you doing?????!!!!
You obviously don’t know a single thing about punk or you would know that you can’t package it nicely with a little bow.
Being punk has nothing to do with following a standard or set style. Any attempt to syndicate punk at all is a step in
the wrong direction!

PS you’ll probably think I’m not punk because I spelled everything right but FUK YOU!.!!!!!!!
Oi! oi! oi! beotch!

sincerely Defiler and DeclineOfSociety

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